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Love Requires Giving

By bro Lee Tian Seng

Love is not selfish but giving. God showed us His love through the giving of His Son to die on the cross for our sins.

John 3:16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

Jesus Christ loved the church and gave Himself to purchase it.

Ephesians 5:25 - Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.

We cannot love without giving to our brethren who are in need.

1 John 3:17 - But whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him?

A fundamental requirement of a good marriage is a willingness to give ourselves for the good of others. Some would only do what is right or good for the relationship only if their spouse do something. For example, one might be willing to apologise if his or her spouse says “sorry” first. Or one would agree to improve in his or her behaviour when his or her spouse behaves better. Such kinds of demand show that one is not willing to give or sacrifice for the sake of the relationship. In order to resolve a conflict, one must be willing to give way so that the other party will do the same.

Matthew 7:12 - Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.

As long as neither spouse will take the first step towards a good marriage, the marriage can never be good. Each must be committed to a good marriage. Each must be willing to sacrifice and give of themselves for the good of the marriage. We see that God loved us and gave His Son, not because we deserve His love.

1 John 4:9, 19 - In this the love of God was manifested toward us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through Him. … 9 We love Him because He first loved us.

Problems in marriage often can be quickly resolved when one spouse starts to improve himself or herself, instead of waiting for the other party to act first.

1 Peter 3:1-2 - Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.

Love in marriage requires us to give and to forgive our spouses. If there is any fault, we should be ready to repent, ask for forgiveness and change our behaviour.

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