By bro Lee Tian Seng
We cannot avoid conflicts in the family but we can reduce their frequency or handle them more effectively. Some common conflicts are over money, parents-in-law, children and household duties. What should Christians do with conflicts in the family?
Firstly, we need to seek the will of God in dealing with problems that lead to conflicts. Some of our problems are sin problems. We sin against God in the way we treat our spouse and others in the family. Or we make unwise decisions that lead to sin. Thus, we need to repent and correct what we do wrongly.
King David sinned when he murdered his general Uriah and took his wife. He repented and God forgave him, but his family was not spared of the consequences of his sin.
2 Samuel 12:13-14 - So David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the Lord.” And Nathan said to David, “The Lord also has put away your sin; you shall not die. However, because by this deed you have given great occasion to the enemies of the Lord to blaspheme, the child also who is born to you shall surely die.”
Next, we need to respect the authority God. The Bible teaches that the head of the wife is the husband and the head of the man is Christ. If we are to respect authority in the family and obey God, we will make godly decisions and honour God in our lives. A bad decision often precedes a huge problem.
1 Corinthians 11:3 - But I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
Ephesians 5:22-24 - Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
We also need to pray for wisdom so that God can guide us through His Word, the Bible. We can do this by applying the teachings and principles of the Scriptures in resolving our conflicts.
James 1:5 – If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.
Finally, we need to trust God in everything. We have many fears when things go wrong and often worry over about our loved ones. Are you fearful about losing your job or of falling sick? Are you worried about the increasing cost of living or the education of your children? God tells us to trust and put our faith in Him in all things.
Proverbs 3:5-6 - Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.
We can deal with problems better and reduce conflicts when we learn to live according to God’s Word, respect His authority, solve problems in His way, and trust Him in everything.